The sound of the alarm breaks the silence of her dwelling place. With sheer annoyance, she hits the snooze button and rolls over. Before she knew it, the alarm sounds off once again. With a load moan, she rolls over to remove her phone from the charger and silence the alarm. For a brief moment, she reads the list of notifications on the lock screen of her phone. A few text messages, news posts, and app notifications. You know...the usual. Nothing important. With a sigh, she rises from the bed.
Reluctantly, she drags her feet to the bathroom. She desperately wanted more sleep, but time was not on her side this morning. She promised that she would attend a NARS event with her cousin at Nordstrom. But…how was she going to ever get ready on time? She had to do her hair, pick out clothes, eat breakfast, and get distracted while getting dressed by watching TV. Too many thoughts flooded her brain. With a shake of her head, she pushed out the thoughts that clouded her mind. At the moment, she wanted to just focus on taking a hot shower. Hopefully, this will help her wake up and get out of the sluggish state she was in. Before pushing the curtain back, she decided to play her favorite playlist she created on the Tidal app.
Feeling clean and refreshed, she stepped out of the shower ready to take on the day. The steam from the shower caused the bathroom to feel like a sauna. As she dried off, she realized that she had a lot more things that she needed to do to in order to leave the house on time. But...she was determined to give it try. Heading to her room, she noticed that her cousin preparing for their mini excursion for the day. "OMG! Look at her makeup! I could never compare to her", she thought to herself. With a lack of confidence, she goes back into her room to get dressed. While choosing her outfit of the day, the image of cousin’s beauty continued to pop back into her head causing her to question her own beauty.
After getting dressed, she decided to create a natural, everyday makeup look. She decided that she wouldn't draw any unwanted attention from others. But as she looked in the mirror at her completed look, she began to pick apart her the beautiful given to her at birth. "What's the point, right?”, she said to herself, "No one will be paying attention to me anyway." Her battle of comparison within desired to suffocate her thoughts from the inside out. I am sure you are wondering how can such a beautiful individual belittle herself?!
Easy...she never grasped that she is beautiful, wonderful, and amazing all on her own. Many people would complement her uniqueness, but it wasn't until she saw the potential within herself that she truly believed what God has been trying to show her all this time. Why did it take for a NARS event for her to realize this known fact?
You see...this wonderful young woman, ME. I am the same young woman who has a bold spirit within, but would question the beautiful features given to me. For many years, I committed a huge crime of belittling myself. Until one day, I allowed myself to be stretched and taken out of my comfort zone. At the NARS event, I allowed a makeup artist to go completely ham on my face. Okay, maybe not "ham", but I did tell him to challenge me. And boy...did he! To this day, I thank God for using that handsome man of a makeup artist. He made me feel beautiful and actually believed it. The features about myself that I hated, he complemented. He assured me that it's okay to feel uncomfortable, as long as I'm trying new things and stepping out of my comfort zone. I left the NARS event with more than a beat face, but a new mindset.
As women, we can be our hardest critic. You may tend to allow your inner thoughts to make you believe that you are not beautiful in your own right. Granted, the content posted within the various areas of media doesn’t help, but you must learn how to begin embracing how beautiful you truly are. In order to do to make those changes, you need to…
Change your mindset
Did you know that your mind is the first thing that needs to be changed in order to produce long-term changes? A person needs to perform the same routine for 21 days in order to seek the results they desire.
Choosing to change the thoughts that enter your mind is not an easy job, but it can be done. Here are some key steps to help you produce positive thoughts:
Remove negative influences from your life such as friends, family, movies, music, social media content, etc.
Expose yourself to inspirational quotes, books, biblical scriptures, podcasts, music, and videos.
Allow yourself to never accept the words spoken over you that is not true.
Let go of the relationship with comparison. Get a divorce from that trick! No, seriously.
Step out of your comfort zone
Fear is one of the major reasons why you may have never decided to come out of your comfort zone. It is one of the reasons why you have remained stuck and have not produced the changes you desire.
You may desire to dress in a particular way or wear makeup, but you are afraid of being judged or criticized. Stop worrying about what other people think or say. If your desires isn’t killing anyone and committing a crime, my only suggestion is to do you boo! It’s time to stop holding yourself back and embrace the changes you desire to see. Letting go will give you the room to breathe and boost your inner confidence. It is a process, but I recommend that you establish a plan for the goals you desire. Be extremely specific on what you would like to accomplish and what you will need to do to reach that overall goal. Make sure you find someone who can help hold you accountable.